American joke - 捨てる神有れば、拾う神あり!
A man is taken into hospital and has some tests taken and is awaiting the doctor with the results. The doctor duly arrives and says to the man:

"I have some good news and some bad news..."

"I can take it Doc give me the bad news!" the man replies.

"I'm terribly sorry but we have to amputate both your legs," says the Doc as professionally as possible.

The man responds, "Well, Doc, this is terrible. At least I have the good news to come, go on Doc give it to me."

Doc replies, "Do you see the man in the opposite bed?"

"Yes, what about him?"

"He said he would buy your slippers."



【2007/06/26 23:27 】 | 英会話 | コメント(0) | トラックバック(0)

英題は' "Hooked" anti-smoking ads spark record complaints'で、詳しい内容はhttp://www.dnaindia.com/report.asp?NewsID=1097222にアクセスすべし!

1. As a matter of fact
2. a real letdown
3. I'm into ~
4. I know what you mean.
5. Slow down!


【2007/06/23 23:02 】 | サークル | コメント(0) | トラックバック(0)
American joke - 役者にもハマリ役と、その反対が!?
Hollywood Harmonies...

Steven Spielberg was holding a very special meeting where he discussed his new project...an action biopic about famous composers starring top movie stars. Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis, and Arnold Schwarzenegger were all present.

Spielberg needed the box office 'oomph' of these superstars, so he was prepared to allow them to select whatever composers they would portray.

"Chopin has always been my favourite, and my image would improve if people saw me playing the piano," said Willis. "I'll play him."

"I've always been partial to Strauss and his waltzes," said Stallone. "I'd like to play him."

Spielberg was very pleased with these choices. "Sounds splendid."

Then, looking at Schwarzenegger, he asked, "Who do you want to be, Arnold?"

Arnold replied, "I'll be Bach."


【2007/06/15 00:09 】 | 英会話 | コメント(0) | トラックバック(0)

英題は"How Foreign Citizens Become Doctors in the US"で、詳しい内容はhttp://www.voanews.com/specialenglish/2007-05-30-voa2.cfmに、アクセスすべし!



【2007/06/09 22:18 】 | サークル | コメント(0) | トラックバック(0)
American joke - 離れ小島で生き残るコツ!?
Artie and Esther are flying to Australia for a two-week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary.

Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives!"

Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the island.

An hour later Artie turns to his wife and asks, "Esther, did we pay our $5,000 PBS pledge check yet?"

"No, sweetheart," she responds.

Artie, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, "Esther, did we pay our American Express card yet?"

"Oh, no! I'm sorry. I forgot to send the check," she says.

"One last thing, Esther. Did you remember to send checks for the Visa and MasterCard this month?" he asks.

"Oh, forgive me, Artie," begged Esther. "I didn't send those, either."

Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years.

Esther pulls away and asks him, "So, why did you kiss me?" to which Artie responds:

"They'll find us!"


【2007/06/06 23:24 】 | 英会話 | コメント(0) | トラックバック(0)
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